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[15 Apr 2007|10:08pm] |
I'm getting a piano for graduation.
hmmmmyes.
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[13 Apr 2007|11:29am] |
I am really not down for being a smoker anymore.
this place that my conscience resides in, it's too good too destroy for no reason.
why not treat it with honor since it is after all...carrying me around in this physical world. I mean, yes...there are plenty of things that hurt us nontheless, and many we can't even help...but come on...what the fuck are we thinking ruining our way of breathing. breathing is so beautiful. I'm gonna live in the woods.
clean body, clean soul god damn it.
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[17 Mar 2007|08:51pm] |
This is so hard.
I am really bad at managing my life and responsibilities. I overwhelm myself to a scary sick amount. I need to stop misusing all this precious time. I need to finish this shit. school and work. so I can get on and go with the rest of my life. I want to live more. I am not gonna come out much for the next few months. Even though I don't come out much as it is. I need to stop wasting time on uselessness. such as sitting and doing nothing at all.
this reality that I am living is a lame one. I feel like for the most part I am not living at all. Hazy and full of insight here and there. good times every so often. I can't believe that this is it. I don't want this to be all. There is so much more. I need it. I crave it. I have to go get it. I am lacking energy.
Time is a big fat lie.
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[17 Mar 2007|08:39pm] |
Our last conversation scares me.
"things always get better adam."
"no, no they don't. they always get worse."
well you were right about this world. but at least now you have freedom and peace of the afterlife. So you and I were both right. because now things are better in the light. My heart goes out to your family and robert. Deeply. I prayed for you, but prayer isn't enough when it was your time to go. Holy fuck you'll be missed. you were simply one of a kind.
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[10 Mar 2007|08:01pm] |
we touched hands.
but only for a moment.
warm glass plates for hands.
and forks and knives for fingers.
I beg my body the main course.
He has a gf.
I'll leave it alone.
but I can't.
but I must.
but I won't.
whata bitch.
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| WOOOOOWWWW |
[04 Mar 2007|08:49pm] |
people suck sooo bad.
I'm getting fucking tired of it.
I'm tired of you.
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[07 Feb 2007|08:09pm] |
Take it slow.
Enjoy it.
nothing is better than nervous smiles and glances.
slightly touching but pretending not to notice.
teasing.
tickling.
enthusiasm.
singing together.
the cuteness is insane.
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| Misrepresent |
[04 Feb 2007|07:12pm] |
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It sucks when you realize even your own friends can't really see YOU.
But it's funny when the most random people can.
It's no ones fault but my own of course though.
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[13 Jan 2007|12:42pm] |
I did it again.
I was blinded by my own imagination.
I started falling.
Getting weak.
Caught up in negativity.
And this is the part where I retore all strength.
Right and Ready.
Bringing it on.
I can take it.
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[06 Jan 2007|12:51pm] |
Oh holy Hell.
I'm fucking up real bad in so many ways.
And I am purely freaked out.
state of drawn out panic.
This is really no fun.
And I am thinking I'm really gonna get fucked over hard.
this may even be it.
I feel sick.
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